Frusturation
Frustration is twisted and prolonged tension, as I see it. Tension is what is created when stretched or pulled in different directions.
When you feel frustrated, check which directions you are pulled into. This can happen in different dimensions of your life. The right level of stretch helps you to some extent. But as the distance increases, stretch takes a toll on you. The tension will eventually lead you to break.
Talent stretch - when you are forced to do what you are not good at. This stretch helps you. Good. You can similarly think about anything.
But let’s delve deeper into desire stretch. You desire something. But something else is happening. This creates a tension within you.
Fit stretch. This is a bigger problem than desire stretch in my mind. You are a fast person and you are working in a slow company. It is a fit stretch. You are put in an environment which fundamentally stretches you. It simply does not align with what you want.
What you want and what you do or are forced to do is fundamentally the root cause of all frustration. Your desires and reality are not aligning.
Now, the bigger problem is when you don’t know what you want. Why? Because, even when you tell yourself you don’t know what you want, you actually want something deep down. But you haven’t just digged that up yet. What does that mean - you are unaware of what you actually want. Which means you are unaware of why that tension is in your life.
You need to sit and understand both- what are you wanting and what is happening. What is the distance? Some tests we talked about here may help.
This happens in a lot of places. In jobs, marriages, friendships, contracts… This is what creates long-term frustrations, when you don’t solve for fit issues. They really build up over time.
It’s like the old story: the frog doesn’t jump out of the beaker when you heat the water slowly to a hundred degrees. The frog jumps out if you put into hundred degrees burning water all of a sudden. Frogs may be smarter because we sometimes don’t jump out even in the second situation.
So you have to be really aware about what is happening. Else the long-term frustration keeps on piling up without you knowing it… And it will break you one day.
Only if we went nuts instead of staying in that frustration!